This is an archive for all the Zweig and Kirtland children.

If you are reading this, you are old enough to comprehend what you are about to read. Perahps your folks told you about this blog, or maybe I did.

I never really kept a steady journal throughout the years.

I don't plan, at the time that I write this, to have children of my own.

I wanted to have a way to pass on my experience to you. Because there will come a time in your life that you feel alone. Like no one understands you. And maybe, just maybe, you'll find some solace in this blog.

I've been planning on writing something like this for years. Though I originally intended it as a book back in the day - it makes more sense to do it like this. It won't be highly refined. There's no over arching story. It will be me, in a pretty raw form, as I try to pass on lessons of my own life onto you.

There won't be a particular order for the topics I post. Some will come spur of the moment. Others I'll have planned to make.

Some will be a few sentences, others will be a page or two long.

Just know, I make this out of love. 

Jeffrey Zweig, II

be afraid of standing still - remain learning and grow

The title pretty much sums it up......

Sex

It is messy, awesome, and imperfect.

Revel in the unique experiences you will have.

Porn is a fantasy - don't expect that in your everyday life.

take chances

Nothing will be gained by not doing so.....

finding a place to live

one of the best independent, life changing experiences you can do.....

budgeting your finances.....

because you need to realize the equivalent exchanges of these things.....

Strange Relationships - Non-Monogamous

Some people would consider the relationships I've held to be "strange" because they are holding up to the monogamous, Christian light that most in our country are so familiar with.

I've never been one to take the road most traveled as it goes to personal decisions that I've made in my life, and you should do the same.

I don't let society define my relationships with others. You should define them for yourself, if they even really need definition!

Set your social rules and stick to them.

As you get older, you're going to have to establish a set of social rules for yourself. Things like what you will and won't tolerate from the general population, friends, partners, family (chosen or otherwise).

No one should tell you what YOUR rules should and shouldn't be, but learn from others, and be ready and willing to change as you see fit.

An examples of the rules is "not chasing people who don't seem interested in you". Interaction is give and take, and if you are the only one giving, then you may want to reconsider if pursuit of them is worth the time and effort. Only you, in the end, can be sure of this.

More important than setting these rules, is sticking to them. At least long enough to know that the rules you have set work for you a majority of the time.

You'll gain this vital knowledge primarily through experience. As the saying goes "if you never have tried it. how do you know you like it?"

Obviously, there are some things you should never try, like using drugs injected by needle (unless prescribed by a doctor or the like.)

Anyway, I hope you get my point.

Birthday 30

The Birthday celebrations this year was ongoing.

This weekend my even was spent with my two partners who surprised me with some sexual and BDSM awesomeness.

People are People....

There is going to come a time when you have to decide what makes a person, a person. And I mean their morals, values, religious or government stance, etc. Always facets make up a person no doubt. But one thing you have to understand the most important thing I think, is that peoplepeople are people. No matter gender, sexual orientation, religion, skin tone, the list goes on and on.

What right do we have as a people to restrict the rights of others? Others who are only looking to belong? You will have to face choices like this eventually, in one way or another. My hope is that you will see that some issues are worth the fight, and some are not.

staying fit

It's important to remain in a good physical condition. Yes, looking good will get you lots of attention, but it also has a lot of overall health benefits, self esteem boost, confidence, etc.

I feel this should be a no brainer, but take it from someone who has bounced from 180, to 260, back to 215, and have noticed how that effects how people interact with me.

In avoiding health problems, like diabetes and such, you have less to worry about any severe issues if you take care of yourself, exercise, and keep a decent diet.

Find social groups that also participate in these things. Surround yourself with people who want to succeed, and won't let you fail.

drugs (in progress)

I've experimented with some non-legal drugs. I passed on it for a long time, up until I was in collage. Partly was, some of our family have had trouble with it, so much that law was involved. Others was I didn't like, and still don't to a degree, having my consciousness altered by substances out of my control. 

Things like weed, should be legalized. The evidence of this can be seen in states like Colorado (there's also Alaska, Oregon, and Washington when I wrote this. There may be more by the time you read this).

Things like heroine, shouldn't be, and we should be doing more to help steer people away, or at least treating them. 

I've done weed, LSD, mushrooms, and ecstasy. 

I won't say I've necessary have had life altering changes, but perhaps minor ones. I don't do them often. 

But stuff prescribed by doctors can also be dangerous. 

I was on Ritalin for most of my young life. It was dangerous as well, and altered my state of mind. I finally had to quit it cold turkey when I thought I had developed multiple personality disorder. 

family - blood over water

Family is your blood born. Family is also who you choose.

Chose your associations wisely.

Old Story - 2 am rescue mission (in progress)

I was 16.....

Personal View - Religion (in progress)

Religion is dangerous if used improperly.

It is as helpful as it can be manipulative.

I cannot say to the fact if there is or is not a God. Truly, no one really can, not even the Pope. But Faith, and believe, are powerful things that compel people.

All we have to go on is our gut, our intelligence, and common sense.

I'm not telling you to dismiss religion - just consider it carefully. If it doesn't do more than serve their own self interests, be doubly sure it's something you really want to get involved with.

Personal View - Transgender Issues

There seems to this stigma, probably like what the homosexual community, religiouos communiyt, so  many communities have had to overcome, that issues affecting one sect of our community also can (and likely will) effect others in some form or fashion.

Basically, see my post that people are people, no matter what their birth,, ethnicity, background etc and you'll know where I'm going with this.

love

it comes in many forms, shapes, sizes, colors.

be social

because that's the world we live in.

make those skills happen. Work on them. own them.

Change your Oil - Responsibilities.

Putting away clothes, changing your oil, doing your taxes, finding your own place, budgeting your finances.....

that is all for today..... that should tell you about the day I'm having.....

Clean your room.....

Because the feeling of self sufficiency starts with organizing your own space.....

Late Bloomer

I recall being told that John Kirtland, my Uncle Jack, was a late bloomer. He was late to marry, or have relationships in his life. It was suppose to make me more comfortable to the fact that, at the time, I had not dated very much. There were many reasons - both personal and social obsticals both in and out of my control. But primarily, I was career driven. I knew what I wanted to do, and didn't make time for things like dating and friends. Perhaps I should have, but I didn't have it in me.

It's not until about 28 when things in my social life, especially with dating, really started to turn around. Part of it was confidence. Part of it was having less of an attachment to my attempts at procuring dates or relationships.

Between Sept. 2014 - 2015, I managed to have 4 girlfriends of varying commitment - after almost five years since my last. After my last relationship ended, it's only taken me 7 months to procure at least one new partner, while another is on the cusp of formulating as well. This string of luck did not come without commitment to achieving the goal of having new, fresh relationships in my life. I did not wait around for them, I pursued them. Which brings me to one of our most common themes of this blog....

Go after what you want.

Very rarely will opportunity just fall in your lap. Through your actions will you create opportunity. All it could take is 20 seconds of insane courage to change your life.

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I'm a person who considers myself a late bloomer - because I usually take a long time to move on things, to change things, or to realize what the best move for me is. A lot of this come from lack of confidence. I grew up not liking myself for a long time, and not being like everyone else I hung out with, so I hampered myself in a lot of ways - sabotaged myself. And I paid for it in a lot of ways.

However, rushing into things headfirst without thought can also be dangerous.

I take time to process things. I take the time to make sure that what I want to do is the best course of action, and then I make that happen. I've just gotten better of actually committing to it, and going about accomplishing it.